FORGOTTEN VERO BEACH

OH, HOW I WISH I COULD!
But no, today's lesson will be - again- one of history and manners children. This week Miss Vero has dined (or more aptly cocktailed) at several locations. The Vero Beach Hotel and Club, the ill fated Patio, Havana Nights tapas bar and The French Quarter. Miss Vero likes to leave this place on weekends and does not do any cavorting on a Friday or Saturday night, which we prefer to leave to the amateur partying crowd.

Now, the Patio we have already discussed and until Mr. Sexton reveals his plan, http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/may/02/patio-restaurant-vero-re-open/ or the elusive Mr. Beaver is heard from, we will remain silent, which indeed is a very difficult task for yours truly. However, Miss Vero will continue to be entertained by the by the verbal sparing and comments posted to the TCPalm website.

The French Quarter fare surprisingly pleased Miss Vero and we were very happy to see one of our favorite people Anna, formally of Charlie's South Beach, happily employed there. Miss Vero remembers fondly Charlie's South Beach all the way back to when it was Charlie Browns. But children that is a story of greed where another restaurant owner left his long time employees high and dry, putting the manager of 15 years, Mister Patrick out on the proverbial street. Miss Vero adores Mr. Patrick (although Mister Patrick will certainly not remember Miss Vero) and is pleased to see Mister Patrick now managing Carmel's.

Where was I? Oh yes, the French Quarter. Forgive me children, Miss Vero's trying to mix a batch of bloody marys and let's just say we are not a multitasker. Miss Vero remembers when the current location housed the Blessings Bistro owned by the Jesus Lady. Now the Blessings Bistro is located on the way to the hospital and the food is still very yummy and the Jesus Lady is a wonderful person, bless her heart, who has found her peace in life. That being said, Miss Vero would like to point out that we feel the same way about some one's religion as we do about some one's penis - only bring to light when asked and never, ever, try to shove it down some one else's throat.

Havana Nights and The Vero Beach Hotel and Club are in a different category aren't they? New, shiney, beachie and recently reviewed by Miss Diana Foote.
It is now that Miss Vero will - gasp - apologize, for one should never be too fabulous to admit a mistake. When searching for Miss Foote's musings earlier this week we misspelled her name and became frustrated by a lack of results on the TCPalm website. No wonder, because we are accustomed to being frustrated by the TCPalm website. In the future, Miss Vero will try to be more careful, but alas, we are only one person.

In her review of Maison Martinique, the lovely restaurant where Miss Vero has dined also, Miss Foote begins "If money is no object" - what a silly thing to say to a beachie. Now I ask you, who do you think goes to this place? The same people lining up at the Olive Garden? Miss Vero remembers fondly the original Chez Yannick and many lovely evenings dining by the piano, but that was then and this is now. Anyone who does remember Chez Yannick, knew that they would not be disappointed at all with the new incarnation. Incidentally, Miss Vero has a gal pal who's favorite pastime is playing "spot the working girl" at the tapas bar. Now as previously reported Miss Foote seems to be fashion challenged by Vero Beach, so we politely advise her to dress conservatively when she sets off to do that review.

Miss Foote's review of the Indigo Room at the Vero Beach Hotel and Club bemoaned the lack of service and was corroborated by another patron. Mira, let me splainsumthin to you Lucy, these, girls, servers or the like make somewhere around $3.50 an hour and are considered unskilled labor, but please let Miss Vero break it down even further. There are only two types of restaurant employees, young people who may or may not still be living at home and people who pay their bills this way. Now the young people- and we can't call them college students because there ain't no damn higher schoolin around here, probably are very attractive beachie spawn hired for their terminal perkiness and do not give a hoot that you're paying 40 stinkin dollars for an entree. And the bill payers are eager to help you but have become so jaded by the snooty elitist 15%er's that you can't blame them.

So children what is the moral of today's story? People and places come and go, things change and every dining experience is different. Restaurant reviews are useless, by any one. The bottom ten items of Miss Foote's reviews give the most pertinent information (prices, type of cuisine, operating hours, etc.). Unless you have the palate of James Beard and you don't, who are you to discern the flavors of Dover sole or foie gras (again, anyone ever heard of PETA?). The best way to know is to find out for yourself. Case in point Carraba's is rated #7 while Maison Martinique ranks #14 on The top 20 restaurants in Vero according to trip advisor (Rita's Italian Ice is#20!). http://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurants-g34709-Vero_Beach_Florida.html
And for the love all humanity, stop treating people in the service industry as servants. Miss Vero likes to share the love with all her dining and drinking cohorts, for without them this truly would be an awful place.

If you were paying attention - and Miss Vero hopes you were - we will not be here for the weekends so you will hear from Miss Vero again on Monday. Be good to each other and if y'all are so inclined, write us a love note.
missvero@live.com