All right kids, listen up cause Miss Vero is telling y'all to put on those life jackets. It seems that the folks that inhabit the barrier island (or as we like to refer to them as the "beachies") have decided to remove themselves a little further from the rest of the county. They have determined that a personal newspaper is in order for their needs and have created "Vero Beach 32963".
"Unlike the Press Journal, Hometown News, or the Beachside News, the print version of Vero Beach 32963 will be mailed free exclusively to all barrier island residences and businesses."
They believe that:
"Residents of our island community tend to be older, better educated, more affluent, pay more in taxes, contribute more to candidates, churches and charities, than residents of the area at large."
The editor - a very serious looking Mr. Milton R. Benjamin, has a big beef with the PJ:
"The Press Journal did a much better job of serving the community when it was owned by my then neighbor in Castaway Cove, John Schumann Jr., than it now does as part of a Cincinnati-based conglomerate that has turned the old Vero Beach Press Journal building into a Potemkin Village"
Don't feel bad children, Miss Vero did not get this man's high falutin, showin off his education reference either, so here y'all :
Take a quick look and run fast, cause this Mr. Benjamin is all business:
So Indian River County becomes more and more like the ill fated Titanic. The first class passengers get the life boats, while the middle class service crew fetches their martinis. The Captain, officers and deck hands (our local government), scramble around wondering what to do and where that big block of ice came from. The poor are locked in steerage (Gifford and such places), where they won't be seen or heard from and the Press Journal Band plays on!
Don't worry about Miss Vero, we'll be playin the unsinkable Molly Brown in this production.
Ya'll want to hear the good news? They have a very good restaurant critic.
Pass Miss Vero one of those martinis sugar, we're needin it bad today.