Monday, March 2, 2009


Ah yes, who can forget Republican presidential hopeful Rudy Giuliani in drag? Or the welcoming committee that greeted him during his campaign in Vero?

Now we ask y'all, which Rudy would you like to spend an evening with? Drag Queen Rudy or rabid Republican candidate Rudy? See it's really simple isn't it? Y'all know Drag Queen Rudy would be a heck of a lot more fun.

Unlike last week, Miss Vero has seriously pondered Max's Article today and we're ready to answer his question, as to why Miss Vero is so fascinated with Drag Queens. The answer is a two parter - #1 We've never had a bad time in the presence of Drag Queens. Never. And #2. - We love the courage that one must put forward to be themselves in spite of society, conformity and social pressure, to transform and transcend, to be who one truly is, in spite of it all.

Max Newport

Well, I’m not dumb but I can’t understand my dear Miss Vero’s fascination with grown men dressing up to look like women, but then again there are quite a few things I don’t understand including the limited use of the kazoo in modern music. But that is a thought for another day. Today I want to focus on this transgender thing. Dressing like a woman is just another item on a long list of things that I don’t plan to do. Not that I really have anything against it. It just ain’t my cup of tea. As Bob Dylan once said . . . “Now, I'm liberal, but to a degree. I want everybody to be free. But if you think that I'll vote for Obama, put on makeup and dress like my daughter, you must think I'm crazy! I wouldn't do it for all the farms in Cuba." Okay, Dylan didn’t really say that, at least in those words.

It is safe to assume that I have never been to a drag queen show, but I did see “Hairspray” on Broadway where Harvey Fierstein played Edna Turnblad, a role later played by John Travolta in the film. John Waters wrote the part in his original 1988 movie for his buddy Divine, so I guess tradition dictates that a man play the role of Edna. What I couldn’t figure from the stage production is how did the lead character, Tracy Turnblad, continue to stay fat? She did the show eight times a week and danced like mad through the whole show. They must have been force feeding her Twinkies between shows. She left a lot of calories on that stage.

On a bet from my brother, Biff, I bought two tickets to see Miss Dixie Longate’s Tupperware Party at the King Center in Melbourne a few months ago.

Mrs. Newport was also pushing for us to go. She developed a headache the day of the show, so I took an old friend who used to work with me. I doubt if she will ever speak to me again.

Well that about does for my spending my hard earned cash to see a man dressed like a woman, but I do have a legitimate curiosity toward those who choose this as a lifestyle.

One of my closest friends from childhood and early adulthood somehow had a revelation in mid-life that he was a woman trapped in a man’s body. He is now Virginia and I have not seen his new personage and we communicate still by email since he lives in New Mexico. I am going to keep using the pronoun “he”, not out of disrespect but out of ignorance and confusion as to how to address a man who lives life as a woman.

When Virginia made this profound discovery and revealed it to me, it was kind of a shocker. We literally grew up together, roommates in college, chased women and generally raised hell for a good portion of our youth. Our thoughts never drifted toward dressing like women, most of our efforts were geared toward undressing as many women as possible. So what made a red-blooded all American male decide he was a female? I think it would require a degree of courage to get out of bed one morning and decide to wear women’s clothes to work. I think he was ultimately fired from the job that he had held for many years. I do know what would happen if I donned a dress and went to work. I would be outta there before my high heeled butt made it to my office chair.
Now I still consider Virginia a friend and I really have tried to understand what would turn him in that direction. I haven’t gotten a clear answer because I don’t think there is one. In an effort to expand my horizons in this area, I watched the movies “Transamerica” and “Normal”. I also watched a few episodes of the IFC show “Transgeneration”. I still don’t get it. We still correspond by email and I think Virginia may visit the Beach House on occasion. I haven’t asked him how far he has taken this transition and maybe I just don’t want to know. He has told me that he is now a lesbian, which led me to ask the yet unanswered question; why go to all of that trouble to change your sexual appearance if you continue to have the same sexual preference? I haven’t received an answer because maybe there isn’t one.

Virginia has started a blog if you want to know more about my old friend. When I read this stuff, it is hard to imagine that this is the same person I spent so much time with growing up. We definitely had everything in common for many years, but now it seems we have very little. We have truly gone in different if not opposite directions.

This whole fascination of dressing like the opposite sex continues to be a mystery to me. Can someone explain the attraction? I seem to be missing something.

Okay. I have lied. When I was nine or ten years old, I had outgrown my clown suit that I always wore for Halloween. I wanted to wear my Cub Scout uniform but my mother decided to dress me up in some of her old clothes and let my sister wear the clown outfit. So for three or four hours, I was dressed in women’s clothes.

Trick or treat?

A big MWAH! to Miss Virginia and welcome to the Beach House hunney!
And thank you Max, as always y'all are a gentleman and a good friend, don't worry too much about it sugah, just continue to be yourself, that's the whole point isn't it?

Oh! And we can't wait till Miss Dixie comes back to town, she'll be in Stuart in April! Road Trip!



Lola said...

Girls will be boys and boys will be girls
Its a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world except for you know who...

You reminded me of an old friend I lost track of. His name is Robbie and he was a woman trapped in a man's body. One fateful Christmas Eve on the internet of all places, maybe it was TCPalm, his world collided with someone named, what was it? Oh yeah, Alexis. Alexis was a man trapped in a woman's body. The last I heard from him he was going to meet her (him?) at Chuckie Cheese's. For all I know they at last found their true soul mate and have spirited away to some exotic place where they are living happily ever after as wife and husband.

As for me, Lola, there's no confusion or fascination. I know what I am and I glad I'm a, wait, what am I? I'm so confused. Lol!

:-* :-*

Count du Roseland said...

Oh Max... you make my head hurt so bad. Nothing like those lovely ladies you speak rather narrow-minded of. They always make me feel gooood!

Oh, I suppose we all must have our own opinions, and that is ok, but Miss Behavior always makes me edit for brevity. I believe I could loan her to you for a bit, if you like.

I feel a rumba coming on and must run now. Oh Countess, have you seen my sarong?

Miss B. Havior said...

Dear Max,

I think the question was, “Well, I’m not dumb but I can’t understand my dear Miss Vero’s fascination with grown men dressing up to look like women.”

Well, I for one will not presume to answer for the President of the Cocktail Party of Vero. She has already done that herself and I agree whole heartedly, but I’d like to dig a little deeper…..

“Women are all female impersonators to some degree.” *

I identify with this quote very much, because to me, it speaks of how women(and men) often have to act in certain ways to conform to what society deems is appropriate for women(and men). That means that a lot of the time, women(and men) are acting when they present themselves to their society, because society often prescribes traits that it thinks women(and men) should have, even if many women (and men) do not have those traits. That is why I wear my silly hat. I admire all the Queens that break thru the stereotypes. I admire all Queens (women and men) for not conforming to the “Vero Outfit” of tan chinos and a white button down shirt or dieting to an unhealthy weight or keeping that “healthy” tan or undergoing cosmetic surgery or givin' up cocktails 'cause it's not good for you.....oh, the list goes on.

*Susan Brownmiller, Against Our Will: Men, Women, and Rape (1975).