And now, the continuing story of "Vero Daze", a soap opera serial brought to you by the makers of Demdefeat - "Just smear away those pesky Democrats!" Works on Liberals too! Now available in old school aerosol packaging!
SETTING:
Early evening. Interior of a recreational vehicle parked in an
undisclosed location in Indian River County:
IRC GOP (Greedy Ole Party) member #1:
Hey, boys this fella Stewart is lookin way too smart
and thar's even a chance he might get elected.
Y'all know we need to keep that thar 6 figure job on the team and in the coffers.
IRC GOP member #2:
What???!!! What in a pigs eye are y'all talkin 'bout Cletus, thar's no way
a Dem person of color is evah gonna be 'lected in these here parts!
IRC GOP member #1:
Weel Poot, that thar whatcha sayin, mighta been true a few years ago,
but with that dadgum real estate boom, a whole lotta new folks that can read done moved into the county and they ain't with the program, heck somum don't even go to church!
IRC GOP member # 3:
Now boys, don't y'all go gettin y'all's tail in a knot, we done got this whole mess taken care of. All we gotta do is make a call to that thar lobby firm we been payin good money to, they gots them a few ways of diggin up some mud just before the election to put peoples mind back on our side.
IRC GOP member #1:
But what about that newspaper, they done already endorsed him in the primary for his party?
IRC GOP member #3:
Dang Cletis, ain't nobody gonna memba that. Besides, ain't nobody gonna go lookin for any truth in the matter 'cept for what we give em - and that includes that "newspaper". They ain't got no spine boys, they'll print what we give 'em. Heck, even that thar Jewish editor is a Republican, now don't that beat all?
IRC GOP member # 1
A Jewish Republican!!?? That' ain't right, I believe it goes against the laws of nature!
IRC GOP members #1, #2, #3
(histerical laughter)
IRC GOP member #1
Ayright, we done got that figured out, now what are we gonna do 'bout Miss Vero?
IRC GOP member #2
Everybody got a price, we'll just pay her to hush up, how much y'all figure it gonna cost?
IRC GOP member #3
How much we got?
IRC GOP members #1, #2, #3
(collective sigh)
MWAH!
8 comments:
ROFL!! You were there, a fly on the wall. Or on the droppings that the GOPPERS are slinging.
JEEEEEEZus aych keeeerist! And we thought it would be an honest election -- not!
Miss V, you see what all that Clem money can getcha? Dirt. Pay dirt. Bless their hearts.
They see somebody honest out there, someone new and fresh and full of the energy and business sense to do more than shop and have social club at work, and by golly, they gotta smash it before it gets legs.
Maybe the people of IRC want better elections, maybe they don't. We'll see. But Mr. Stewart, honey, you hang IN. One day people here will get tired of this crap, just like the rest of the country has done. Finally.
LOL, that was pretty funny. Think you insulted or embarrassed a few GOP'ers? Oh that's right, you can't insult or embarrass some of them. I'm so saturated with the national election that I can hardly wait until it's over. Is it my imagination or is every TV ad a negative one? At this point I almost don't care who wins as long as I don't have to look at them or listen to them- at least for a little while... Lola
Lola, my dear, I understand your angst over the mess that is US political campaigning. It goes on too long, the laws don't do nuthin' to stop the massive amounts of $$$$ wasted and the commercials -- gaawd!
But please don't think that just cuz both parties are doin' it means that both parties are the same. Through it all we still gotta determine our future, and who leads us there. From little city to Tall'ee to DC.
Please make sure, you all out there, that you LOOK at the agendas, as best you can determine. Just do a little bit o' thinkin' about goals, not personalities or the silly crap that campaigns are forced to do simply BECAUSE many people don't look beyond the ads. They work only cuz we let those ads work.
And these meetings, they happen just like Miz V done said. The bad politicians are being "elected" by the insiders, good ole boys and girls, and not by us.
Don't let the corruption create apathy! That's why we keep getting Tom "hand me another perk" White, Bob "I've bankrupted everything in sight" Solari, Wesley "never seen a land deal I don't like" Davis, etc. etc.
Thanks for the pep talk blessurheart, it helped. I'll be alright. :-) I've got most of the issues worked out to where I know who and what to vote for- for better or worse.
And I'm looking forward to election day and hitting the voting booth. I actually love the "mojo" at the polls on election day.
Lola
My small cheerleader moment - but a passion, nonetheless. Thx
I, too, am a election day "go to the polls" junkie -- have always preferred that to just mailing it in.
And while I'm at it, the damn Fla. legislature keeps putting these amendments out for public vote on issues that should really be in laws -- why are tax breaks getting put into the constitution? Our "leaders" in Tall'ee keep saying we're too dumb to vote on the hometown democracy issues, to manage growth, but hey, we're all qualified on taxes, money, and taking the hit for lowering tax income so they don't have to be the ones.
sigh . . . .
Blessurheart, I agree. What are they thinking, trying to attach ammendments to the FL Constitution that would better serve us as bills? One of the things that has got us in this mess (um, I mean the one about fair representation, that is) is that we (the citizens/taxpayers/voters) are conditione by the effect of the television age to make judgements and decisions based entirely on SOUNDBITES. Soundbites are rarely accurate, and never, I repeat, NEVER a fair representation of the truth! But as long as we do not make the time to investigate independent sources of information, and question (to the point of verification) even those points we agree with, then the "leaders" FROM THE LOCAL LEVEL ON UP will get away with treating us like we are stupid and making our decisions for us, while covering their real agenda with illegitimate constitutional ammendment proposals which are a no-win siuation (if you vote them up, you clog our constitution with ridiculous add-ons, and if you vote them down, you give rise to the soundbite that you don't consider the issue valuable, so why even present it to you on the ballot?). Even in our own county, our taxpayers/voters, by-and-large, are asleep at the wheel, and do not investigate the issues right here in our county. They buy into the rhetoric that spews from the County Commission and the Republican Party (my own party, I am embarrassed to say)...two cases in point are the sand mining regulation issue (and larger issues of government control that have recently sprung out of it) and Liberty Park. All the followers of Miss Vero's blog (BTW, a HUGE thank you to Miss Vero, who I have met, but surely would not remember little ole me :-), and who probably does not realize the extent of her influence) seem to be reasonable people who want the truth. We need you! Thank you.
So agree with several points, "anonymous" FOMV. Most importantly that we are so lucky to have Miss Vero here and giving us a platform to speak that isn't tainted by the PJ "editing machine" and actually cares about the truth.
Don't even get me started on Libery Park, for godssake. There's a hole in the urban service line big enough to drive us all to drink. OK, drink more.
I, too, am a registered repub, and am ashamed of the party, especially here in Indian River County.
Will share something I spotted on a recent trip to WPB -- couldn't grab a camera fast enough, but follow this link:
http://oxdown.firedoglake.com/diary/508
I agree with both your assessments too. I hadn't really thought about the sort of Catch 22 with the Amendments. "(if you vote them up, you clog our constitution with ridiculous add-ons, and if you vote them down, you give rise to the soundbite that you don't consider the issue valuable, so why even present it to you on the ballot?)"
Amendments seem to be a clever way to hide their cowardice, their ineptitude, or cover their posteriors. (But they're not going to take their chances when it comes to Hometown Democracy.)
Lola
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