Monday, November 24, 2008

MAX ON MONDAY!

Hey kids, it's that time again when we sit back and listen to the tales of our friend, Max Newport. Today ole Max has a few issues with a local source that sprouts sour fruit. Now y'all know, Max and Miss Vero don't necessarily agree on everything, but we do agree on this. Max and I were talking about just how much we can juice this particular topic and how much longer we'll have to endure this tart typist. We've come to the conclusion that our efforts to try and understand the wisdom of the PJ editors in continuing the Lemmon bombs are, well... fruitless!

Just when we think it can't get any worse, it does. Really, who actually pays money to see Donny and Marie in Las Vegas. And then admits it. In print. Honestly, we don't know whether to laugh or cry. It's almost as bad as all the putrid puns we just tossed your way. But not quite.


LEMMON TREE NOT SO PRETTY
Max Newport

Last week I was having lunch with a friend who, of course, knows me but does not know Max. We were discussing the aftermath of the elections and mention was made of perhaps the lamest and most pathetic article ever published by the Press Journal which was a special Saturday appearance of Russ “Are you calling me a liar?” Lemmon on November 1, just a few days before the election. My friend wondered why the paper would hire someone who was obviously not very bright, had no sense of humor and was quite lazy as a fact checker to be a writer on local issues; especially when it was quite apparent he knows nothing about Vero Beach!

I conjectured that maybe the paper was looking for a “fish out of water” perspective reminiscent of “The Beverly Hillbillies” and “Green Acres”. His wife being one of the editors for the Scripps organization may have been a factor as well. Lemmon used his special Saturday appearance to blatantly call Kay Clem a liar because she challenged his ability to, now get this, rely on actual facts for his stories.

Russ adeptly typed:

Supervisor of Elections Kay Clem is at it again. Lying, that is. On a paid political advertisement that will run throughout the weekend on Channel 10, Clem told this whopper about me: "He told me in my office he doesn't have to worry about the facts — he just has to get the story out."

http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/nov/01/clem-tells-whopper-in-tv-ad/

He then goes on to challenge Ms. Clem to a polygraph to be administered the DAY BEFORE THE ELECTION!!! Can you imagine the headlines if the supervisor of elections abandoned her duties to go along with Lemmon’s little ploy?And yes, if Lemmon claims that he worries about the facts, then he is a liar. He proved that when he failed to include the FACT that the elections office was closed when he accused Kay Clem of being on a “shopping spree” in Orlando instead of being in her office. Including this fact would detract from the inference that he was trying to make against Clem and for the obvious apple of his eye, Cathy Hart. Is that consistent with someone who “worries about the facts”?

If omission of a fact that does not fit your agenda constitutes a lie, and I say it does, then Russ Lemmon is a liar. With a little help from Google, it is not hard to discover that Lemmon has a legacy for this type of behavior while a typist at The Toledo Blade.

Russ Lemmon is a remarkable fool. Toledo standards are low enough that he is notable :-) ' posted by katie82640 at 10:43 P.M. EST on Tue Jul 04, 2006

Russ Lemmon's 'column' is a waste of newsprint (although it could be intelligently argued the entire paper is). posted by Darkseid at 05:51 A.M. EST on Wed Jul 05, 2006

Lemmon is writing out of both sides of his mouth. posted by sparky at 07:21 A.M. EST on Wed Jul 05, 2006

http://www.toledotalk.com/cgi-bin/comments.pl/7/2669

I wouldn't take too much of what Russ Lemmon says seriously. They should put his non-media watchdog columns on the funnies page. posted by Kevin at 11:09 P.M. EST on Mon Jun 27, 2005

http://www.toledotalk.com/cgi-bin/comments.pl/21/1223

Hooda Thunkit said…Maggie, Don't take Russ too seriously, hardly anyone else does ;-) He is known for, and prides himself on, never letting the facts ruin one of his stories.

historymike said... Heh. Agreed about the creator of the Lemmon Droppings. He's light on content and heavy on drivel, as well as the antithesis of everything that is good about the Blade. On the rare occasions I make it through an entire Russ Lemmon column, I end up questioning if I am secretly masochistic. There is no other explanation for my persistence.

Kate said... You know my Gr'ma used to say God was fair. He either doled out brains or looks. Anybody ever seen this Lemmon guy? He must be one handsome dude....

http://thurbersthoughts.blogspot.com/2006/08/letter-to-russ-lemmon.html

Those were found after about a ten minute session on the search engine. The Toledo Blade, for some reason, decided not to make the comments to his articles available. Can you think of any reason why they would not want us to read those nuggets? Max is stumped.When Lemmon left the Blade to grace us with his presence, Ohio Media Watch kind of left me with the impression that his presence would not be sorely missed.

“OMW has not heard of any possible replacement for Lemmon as far as the Blade's radio/TV/media beat is concerned, and we wouldn't be surprised if they just did not fill it...”

http://ohiomedia.blogspot.com/2006_11_01_archive.html

Max has probably picked on Russ enough for one sitting. Lemmon is such a gold mine. I have enough for two more articles without revisiting my friend Google. I’ll save the six packs and April Fool for later but I must comment on Lemmon’s typing last week about his trip to Viva Las Vegas. As I read it, the highlight of the trip was seeing Donnie and Marie and counting six construction cranes from his 12th floor hotel room. Last year, while on vacation he went to Toledo and wrote a column for the Blade.

http://www.toledoblade.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20071209/OPINION04/71209016

Let the good times roll you party animal!

Now Russ does have a way of fighting back against his so-called cyberpunks and yes, he is brutal.

Jan. 15, 2006--Seven molasses-coated Lemmon Drops to nibble on while waiting for "Sassy Sarah" to enter a 12-step program for Internet addiction:
http://www.redorbit.com/news/education/358026/ferner_could_learn_from_the_catholics/index.html

Maybe someday Max Newport and Miss Vero can reach the lofty heights achieved by “Sassy Sarah”. Until then, we can only hope.







MWAH!


missvero@live.com

7 comments:

fairy delilah said...

Liberals are a funny breed, Max. We root for the underdog, help the poor and give to the needy. Your rant may produce a counter-intuitive outcome: people feeling sorry for the butt of your joke, the focus of your ridicule.

I, for one, wonder if you would have a different perspective if Mr. Lemmon Drops would have supported Kay Clem, calling Mr. Stewart a liar.

And, while Donny and Marie would not be my choice of a good time in Vegas, nor would Celine Dion or Wayne Newton, the confession by Russ seemed to be an attempt at self-deprecating humor.

When it comes to nepotism on the Treasure Coast, Scripps by no way has a monopoly.

All in all, I think this columnist whose writing skills demonstrate more bark than bite is getting way more attention than he deserves.

As I have had the opportunity to tell many other men, "he don't pay rent to occupy space in my mind!"

However, with your writing talent and familiarity with local history, I would love to hear juicy stories about the good ole boys, the back room deals, how things came to be as they are (Doc. Fisher, Sheriff Doubek, etc.) It may shed light on how to unravel the situation, as well as give us something truly unsavory to ponder Monday mornings.

Fairy D.

virtual vero said...

"Liberals are a funny breed, Max. We root for the underdog, help the poor and give to the needy."

Even when no one's looking!

Raised in Vero Guy said...

I say make lemonade out of Mr. lemmon.

I certainly do not agree with everything he says, but I don’t want to. In some ways he is a breath of fresh air. He is not one of those journalist that identify the target audience and feed them whatever garbage they need to hear to his ratings stay high.
Some of what Russ writes is really on-point….I also believe that some of what Russ writes is garbage. I LIKE THAT! I’ve been married a very long time; I’m used to receiving a sometimes opposing view of the world. I say keep Russ. If nothing else, he is entertaining.

BlessUrHeart said...

If the rest of the paper had any real reporting in it, we wouldn't be so bothered. But they allow this rather junk-filled column to pass for "news," and allow someone to print things that aren't true as "facts."

It's only harmless if people understand what is true. yellow journalism -- how appropriately named for referring to lemmon -- is all about the reaction, not the content. That is what people find objectionable.

Max Newport said...

fairy delilah,

Hi. I do feel sorry for Russ but cannot ignore his obvious bias. And yes, if he had attacked Stewart the same way he did Clem, I would have felt the same way. It seemed that every column he wrote had some negative mention of Clem and he even wrote a special column to attack her and call her a liar. I think calling someone a liar without substantiation is about as low as you can go and I have never seen anything like that in print that I can recall. If he called Stewart a liar without substantiation, I certainly would have called him on that. I don't like to see anyone picked on unfairly and you have to agree that Russ was on a mission with Clem.

I would love to go out and dig into some real dirt in this county but I have a real full time, full time job. When Miss Vero asked me to write a column, I agreed on the condition that I wouldn't put more than an hour into each article.

You are right, I am in no position to criticize anyone going to see Donny and Marie. I paid good money to see "Cats" on Broadway and that is three hours I will never get back.

I don't think a columnist, who is not on the opinion page, should try to sway the voters toward or against any candidate and calling anyone a liar without evidence to back it up is just wrong.

And yes, I do feel sadness for Russ. I hear him occasionally on the radio and he sounds like a very unhappy man.

Miss B. Havior said...

Max hunny-luv the picture, you ole hound dog! But I know for a fact your nose isn't that big! ;)

cicifromdeecee said...

first the buckeyes sent us Tom Maher, school superintendant extraordinaire. then they send us Russ Lemmon. What did we ever do to Ohio?