Tuesday, July 15, 2008

OUR NEW BOYFRIEND, BALTIMORE

Let's just say that Miss Vero is not a big fan of sports, but we have been keepin on eye on the Dodgertown saga because, well, it's in Vero. Now that we've all gotten the official word that the Dodgers are leaving and word on the street in Baltimore seems to agree: http://www.wbaltv.com/news/16876218/detail.html
Looks like we're gonna have to get used to the idea that there's a new boy in town.


Well hunnies, we gotta tell y'all, it just feels like we've been dumped by our forever boyfriend, LA and have to settle for our only prospect, Baltimore. We did try flirtin with Boston, but he mighta been just too far outa our league, so to speak. Big Daddy Joe Baird and Uncle Bubba Jim Gabbard, kept insistin that we keep company with this new boy, Baltimore. All they care about is baseball, but we wonder if they know anything else about our new beau.

The birthplace of Nancy Pelosi and Tupac Shakur, Baltimore seems to be far more diverse than Vero Beach. Baltimore is also the home of John Waters, one of our favorite peculiar people. In fact, not too awful long ago, we happened to run into him in Monterey, California and we also happen to know Mink Stole, a famous thespian from the John Water repertory. So with that in mind, we were thinkin, on ways to make this new baseball boyfriend a little more lively.

Wouldn't it be fun to have John Waters night at Holeman Stadium? We could all dress up like characters from John Waters movies and wave pink flamingos at the team. We were thinkin that Mr. Wheeler would make a fabulous Divine, but we doubt he has the energy for it. Perhaps our own Wesley Davis might step up to the plate, you know, takin one for the team. And Miss Sandra Bowden! Don't y'all think she would be a classy Edith Massey? Maybe Vero Beach could become famous for that! And wouldn't that just make Miss Vero happier than Divine with a plate o'pooh!

http://www.dreamlandnews.com/
http://www.minkstole.com/
http://www.dreamlandnews.com/divine/
http://www.theoretical.com/eddie.html

We could start practicin this camp dress up idea when the Rocky Horror Picture show comes to town on August 1st and 2nd (can y'all imagine?) at The Riverside Theater:
https://tickets.riversidetheatre.com/public/
Y'all know we'll be there, right?

We are feelin so much better, at least now we have somethin to look forward to, this Baltimore boyfriend is given us a whole new outlook. Thanks Big Daddy and Uncle Bubba!

Mix up some cocktails and pop in the Hairspray CD, we feel a party comin on!

MWAH!

missvero@live.com

2 comments:

BlessUrHeart said...

Miss Vero! Our new boyfriend holds flamingos close to his heart, as we do in Vero Beach, so forget that internet dating and just call Joe Baird. And you, my dear, are close to all our hearts, as well. Funny, funny, smart Miss Vero.

Should have posted this yesterday, but here we are:

"More, Please!"

More is good, right darlins? Miss Vero would ascribe to that sayin', sho 'nuff. More parties. More friends. More allkeehol.

But is there any verity in that other maxim that "less is more?" In contemplatin' the over-abundance of repeat puppy-toy purveyors Miss Vero mentioned yesterday, did we ASK for three pet stores within a 1/4 mile of each other? Did the franchise owners accidentally set a cup of sweet tea on that "approved" button on their keyboard without noticin'? That scruffy little ole honey-child Oliver Twist asked for more, and look where it got him, hunnies.

There is yin and yang for some "more" devotees, though, since doesn't it create less somewhere else? Not when it comes to Thanksgiving and cocktails, of course, but don't let's get any MADD discussions, as we are sure that Miss Vero always drinks like a lady. But how 'bout more water, less land. More corn in the field, less wheat. More houses, less farms. Bringin' it home to Vero Beach, now, more houses, less citrus trees. Don't y'all miss that wafting smell of orange blossoms that knocked us, flip-flops over sun-bonnets, every spring?

For those who love video games, although our own parents told us no to watch too much TV or it'd just ruin our eyes, we surely see the fun in blowin' up things from time to time. Cartoon things. But we also see little ones playin' hours and hours . . . and hours . . . when ARE you going outside, children, and givin' Mom and Dad some peace? Build a treehouse, and bless your hearts.

Well, then there's the PJ taking "less is more" and proving THAT all wrong. Less is definitely less. Taking it to new lows. They got it all wrong. Instead of slicing column width, maybe they should slice Lemmons. And they could indeed cut off their Foote and not spite their face.

Thank you for bein' our best source for news, Miss Vero. You are a true blessing. mwah back atcha!

Miss Vero said...

Oh mah, goodness! Well what can we say but - "Bless YOUR Heart!"
We are truly humbled by your kind words. Finally - "slice Lemmons and cut off their Foote" - somebody made Miss Vero laugh!