Friday, August 29, 2008


Miss Vero doesn't like to say "We told y'all so", Miss Vero LOVES to say "We told ya'll so!" Comments and emails to our blog are suggesting that corruption runs deep in this county, not just in the counting of votes but in the campaign contributions as well. And at 4:45 pm yesterday, this little news item was spotted on the TCPalm website that made it to today's front page:

Yes, of course, this will make it right, we knew there was sometin up, we're all gonna write our State Representative (Um, would that be Stan Mayfield?) and then we're gonna march and hold signs and protest and we'll never be lied to again!

Arlene Lorenzo: How dare those people treat us like we're stupid teenage girls.
Betsy Jobs: We are stupid teenage girls.
Arlene Lorenzo: No. We're human beings, and we're American citizens. And four score and seven years ago our forefathers... did something.

Dialogue from one of our favorite movies of all time, we laugh and cry, laugh and cry and sing along to all the 70's songs:
Rent it, buy it, watch it!

But seriously, what are we all going to do about it? Alert the media? We are in the media dead zone between the Orlando and Palm Beach market for TV coverage and our local TV10 can't even get a website up and running. And y'all already know what we think of our cat litter newspaper.

If a presidential election can be messed with ( and it doesn't matter who y'all voted for, y'all know there was dirty politics at work), this local election is just gonna get swept right under the rug and our local opinionated columnist will go back to counting licence plates.

If ya'll screw one willing 16 year old boy, ya'll get 30 years behind bars, but if y'all screw the whole county, y'all get a high paying job!

Rowdy Republican Dinosaur Gets Kicked out of Undertow Party.

It was actually a pretty quiet night at the epicenter of cool. Everyone very politely watched the convention and Mr. Obama's acceptance speech. Miss Kitty finally got some free time to sit down and enjoy being with friends and Miss Vero was so impressed with those of y'all that showed up and voiced their support for the Beach House. Thank y'all so much!

We are off this weekend to get the heck out of town and go celebrate at the Palm Beach Playboy's weekend birthday bash! Found a swimsuit on sale at Dillard's that will encase our whale blubber butt and am looking forward to lounging by a pool and having endless cocktails perched in my hand! Will try real hard not to think of Vero Beach. Maybe it's all a bad dream.


Thursday, August 28, 2008


Not that the PJ woulda told y'all, but tonight's acceptance speech by Senator Obama will be an event shared by many in Indian River County:

Now, say what y'all will about this presidential election, but it is history kids.

Of course y'all know we'll be making an appearance at the epicenter of cool - Undertow. Not that we didn't consider attending Miss Claudette Pelletier's party or sampling some Bar-bee-que at Grant's in Gifford, it's just that when Undertow is thrown into the mix, y'all know where our allegiance lies.

Speakin of which, let us take the time to point out, right here and now, that Miss Vero is not a member of the democratic party nor the republican party and once again will remind y'all that we are a strong supporter of the cocktail party.

Sorry kids, but the whole political process has just got us in a funk and rumors that we heard about the local primary yesterday are just gasoline on the fire. Did certain "companies" pay employees to vote certain ways? Did certain people supporting certain agendas, contribute cash in unscrupulous ways to candidate's campaign coffers? Check out the comments on our post yesterday, it's just a tip of the iceburg to the emails we received.

Sigh...If only there was a real investigative journalist among us.

We see there's a sale on swimsuits at Dillards, how 'bout we go try some on, that ought to be so much more pleasant than thinking about local politics and our impotent local newspaper.


Wednesday, August 27, 2008



There's a few things that Miss Vero's gin soaked brain just doesn't quite understand...

Like, how does a candidate with what seems like a gazillion very vocal supporters on every street corner waving signs come in dead last? (Kent Campbell with only 16% of the vote)

And, how can we ever take anyone serious named Duuurrrl? Oh never mind, he's got a gun.

And, what ever happened to that huge group of people that were gonna chase ole Gary Wheeler outa town?

Ya'll reckon they just took it out on Miss Sandra Bowden instead?

And will the run off between Miss Claudia Jimenez and Charlie Wilson be like a local production of "Inherit the Wind"? (and how do we get tickets?)

And finally who in the H.E. double toothpicks voted for Stan Mayfield? If there was ever a corruption, er, election that reeked of good ole boy politics, it was this one.

Should we be a conspiracy theorist? How do all of the PJ picks manage to get elected? Ahh, the most read newspaper on the treasure coast, and the only newspaper on the treasure coast.
Move over Russ, looks like we'll have the humble pie today.

A Sincere Thank You...
... is in order, for the wonderful and kind words from Captain Bill McMullen, who sent Miss Vero a very personal e mail expressing his thanks for what little support we gave him.

And now, to cure our election depression, we must drink many cocktails and go shopping, although not in that order.


Tuesday, August 26, 2008


So, we're sitting in a bar on a Monday night, enjoying a libation and a spring roll (we were upstairs at the Szechuan Palace),when we look out the window and see Ed Glaser and Wesley Davis yuckin it up on the corner of 43rd and state road 60. We can't even begin to imagine what went on in that conversation, but apparently there was no need to hold up signs and wave to voters.

A short time later Mr. Glaser himself, comes into the Szechuan Palace hideaway to enjoy his own libation and spring roll. What are the odds kids? Now y'all know Miss Vero just had to strike up a little conversation, so we asked Mr. Glaser - if he wasn't in the race, who would he like to see win and y'all know what? He said he wouldn't say cause he 's the best qualified and he's gonna win and then he invited us to his victory party tonight at the Atlantic Grill. So there. (pssst, don't tell Mr. Glaser, but we still like our bubba, Captain Bill McMullen).

We got home from our little outing just in time to see Senator Kennedy give his speech at the Democratic convention. It was nice to be reminded that there's another party out there, somewhere. Just not mentioned much around these parts.

We hear that bob Evans has two new menu items especially for Mr. Lemmon tomorrow - humble pie and crow.

Planning on a little outing again tonight, wonder who we'll run into next?


Monday, August 25, 2008


"You cyber punks stay offa my column!"

Miss Vero is noticing a little age perspective creepin into Mr. Lemmon's columns lately. Yesterday he was rattled by "anonymous cyberpunks" that "take cheap shots" and suggested that, in using something he wrote in her campaign mailing, Miss Cathy Hart was "stealing" from him (he should be flattered). Last week he was praising a kid who walked in the rain to school because, in his day, he walked in rain, sleet and snow to school. Before the primary he registered republican (tryin to fit in around here?) and a couple of months ago he announced that he received his AARP card (now he probably asks for a discount at Bob Evans). But what is worse, like an old timer set in his ways, he is not paying attention to what people are screaming at him. Just take a look y'all, at the comments by "anonymous cyberpunk" jsteel about what's going on at the hospital and it makes you wonder why some one isn't addressing these concerns. At least it made us wonder.


There are quite a few things Indian River County is infamous for and besides political corruption, one is the arrogant ways of the medical community. If indeed, Mr. Lemmon searched out some current employees of the hospital to talk to he would have a hard time getting information, why? Well, here's what Miss Vero heard :

  • The hospital staff must sign a contract to not speak with the media while employed
  • The union has a contract that guarantees not to strike against the hospital
  • The current and former CEO is given a club membership to highly exclusive local golf and country clubs
  • There is/was such a thing as the "Golden Eagles" club, where big benefactors were/are promised superior care
  • The hospital is in the business of providing the illusion that it gives the beach community above board care, hence the DUKE name and it's well connected CEO and the donations pour in.

    True? Heck if we were a "real journalist" and not an "anonymous cyberpunk" we'd find out for sure.


After someone spoke in place of someone who could not attend the luncheon on Saturday, an innocent request to a room full of women was greeted with a wave of laughter - "Is there anyone else here, who would like to talk about someone who isn't here?"

The only female candidates on tomorrow's ballot in Indian River County that did NOT attend the NOW luncheon were Miss Cathy Hart, Miss Kay Klem and Miss Rene Hamblin, all running for the Elections Supervisor office.

And speakin of the Supervisor of Elections office, here's a story told to Miss Vero by one of our regular church goin friends. Seems like our friend just realized that the gentleman he's been sitting in front of, behind and next to in church for the last two years is Mr. Colman Stewart. And during all that time and through many conversations, not once has Mr. Stewart mentioned that he is running for office. We sincerely appreciated the way the Mr. Stewart appropriately places his faith and politics and feel that he has set an example for others to follow. We wish him success in his bid for Supervisor of Elections.


Happy Birthday Week to the Palm Beach Playboy who's big weekend bash we are eagerly lookin forward to.

Miss B. Havior - girl, you'd better get that liquor we drank up last night replaced before the Count and Countess return home from nips and tucks in Swiss Miss Land.

And somehow during our very busy, busy weekend, Miss Vero decided we would take a tour of the homes going on the auction block at Antilles. Yes, they are very, very nice homes, however we have a great concern over the legal goin on's of the community. Not that we're a "real journalist", but we sure would look into this story:

(type in Colonial Bank and the date 7/31/08 in search)

Should be an interesting week kids, can't wait to see how the primary turns out tomorrow, don't forget to vote!


Friday, August 22, 2008


Well, now y'all know how we feel about that.

But come on, disaster? Yes it rained and yes, it flooded, but Miss Vero has been around Florida too long to think this is unusual. The only thing new is the availability of digital cameras, internet access and political photo ops -Hello Gubna Charlie! Like we told y'all yesterday, we live in a swamp.

We finally ventured out and went to visit our good friend, Dr. John, who made the very precise observation that if y'all fly over the state, it'll make you wonder how it's possible for anyone to live here at all. Among his many abilities, Dr. John is also a pilot. We are still wondering why WZZR doesn't give him his own damn show.

We have another friend from high school who went on to become a hydro geologist for Dade County and when we asked him about the aquifer, he told us - well let's just say it's not pretty. And for all of y'all that are out there splashin around in the new "lakes" in your neighborhood, well hunnies, look up these words - "cesspools" which are sometimes inhabited by "watermocasins". If those two ideas don't get y'all out them damn puddles, we don't know what will.


Ok, it's time to fess up. We've been listening to Rhett Palmer. Yes we know, crazy, but true. But kids, ever since he made the claim that he was at Woodstock, we have wondered what else would come out his silly mouth and now that it's election time, he's had a lot of the local candidates on and we get to hear what comes out of their silly mouths too.

A few things that made us laugh and cringe:

So we're driving back from Dr. John's yesterday and Rhett is telling this story about trying to interview Mike Wallace and things keep going wrong and he doesn't get the interview. Then "by divine intervention" he meets Wallace in a movie theater and because he's been such a pest (he even knows he's a pest!) he finally gets the interview. Now the funny part is when Rhett says "divine intervention", his co-host David Walsh (who we love!) says "because God has nothing better to do than intervene for you"!

Then one day, Rhett has all four republican Indian River County Sheriff candidates on his show and announces that "one of these men will be the next Sheriff". Ok, so that pretty much means that if you are a democrat or non-party affiliate you're screwed in Indian River County. Hmm, should we even be surprised?

Speaking of republican conservatives, what's up with Charlie Wilson? He proudly runs his "conservative" radio and print ads taking the moral high ground and NOT wanting to teach sex education in schools, but is well known around town for leering at every blond that crosses his path.

Yes, let's apply the "just say no" technique to sex, because it worked so well for the drug problem.

Oh yeah children, Miss Vero is calling everyone out on the playground today.

Overheard and reported to Miss Vero:

At Tuesday's soggy county commission meeting, commissioner "A" asking commissioner "B" if commissioner "C" is "Miss Vero". Now y'all know we love the attention, but don't these people have more important matters of discussion or a county to run while a "disaster" tropical storm is looming? Ooops, rhetorical questions, sorry.

We were actually thinking of attending that particular meeting but an email from the Indian River County Emergency guy Tony Carper (no offence but we really miss Nate McCollum), said to stay home. Stay home means don't go anywhere right? So we didn't go, we watched the meeting later that day on their website and we noticed for the first time that they have something called an "invocation" before the meeting, which is a prayer!

Let's review:
Things that don't exist in Iran - Atheists, Homosexuals and Sex Education.
Things that don't exist in Indian River County - Atheists, Homosexuals and Sex Education.

Miss Vero is one that does not like to mix religion with politics or vice-a-versa and yesterday,when we were done laughing at, um we mean, listening to Mr. Palmer we turned our attention to NPR where this interesting discussion of that particular subject was featured:

And here's the article - "More Americans Question Religion's Role In Politics,
Some Social Conservative Disillusionment"

We said this before and we'll say it again, Miss Vero would like to point out that we feel the same way about some one's religion as we do about some one's penis - only bring it to light when asked and never, ever, try to shove it down some one else's throat.

The last time we uttered those words was in our very third installment of the Beach House (read May 2nd post "Forgotten Vero Beach") where we discussed the French Quarter restaurant. Maybe it was all the disaster flooding that ironically had us dining there again last night.

Kids, the place was packed! Chef Ian sure is doing something right, maybe it's the Thursday night lobster special. We were just happy to see one of our favorite people, Miss Anna, formally of Charlie's South Beach (another closed Vero restaurant). We can always count on Miss Anna to be absolutely charming and we adore the fact that her wine knowledge always makes us happy.


We hear that there's a luncheon tomorrow, sponsored by NOW (the National Organization for Women). Here's the contact info:

Indian River NOW: Celebrate Women's Equality Day. Marsh Landing Restaurant, 44 N. Broadway, Fellsmere, 11:30 a.m. $16-$20. at the door. Registration: (772) 794-7773

Miss Vero has fond memories of way back when little Miss Vero had herself a job as a press liaison in Washington D.C. for NOW. But that was then and this is NOW now. A tamer version of the fiesty NOW, this is a quaint little group in Indian River County that are giving a forum to the women candidates and more importantly commemorating the anniversary of the woman's right to vote. Fellsmere, for all of y'all that don't know, was the first city in Florida to allow women to vote - five years before the 19th Amendment.

So it's fittin that there should be a luncheon at Marsh Landing and we think we will pop in and say hello to Miss Fran Adams, the queen of Fellsmere and Miss Sarah the mayor (if she's in attendance). In case y'all haven't noticed we sure do like Fellsmere. Did y'all noticed they weren't whining about floodin, they just got out the ole airboats and got around just fine. Not like these people:


Told to us by a John's Island resident - "Apparently after just getting off the phone with "God" and demanding that the rain stop, the next call was to the club demanding that the golf course open. Whomever this particular person is darhling, could not understand why his demand was not met and complained loudly to other club members."

Seems that some golfers are impatient to get back to their resource draining pass time, even Miss Vero got an email from our own club that assured us that all was being done to solve the drainage problems. One more time people - WE LIVE IN A SWAMP!

We're still sorting out our emails but here's a really great picture from our friend and beach real estate queen, Barbara Martino-Silva, who ventured out on the beach after the storm:

And check this out! Another friend, who would like us to call him the "Irritable Chimp" (and Miss Vero will happily comply), sent us the coolest thing ever! We just, love, love, love this:

OK! We done wore out our welcome today! We know y'all were a little disappointed this week, cause we didn't keep y'all that entertained during the storm, but we sure hope we made up for it today. Thanks for all the emails!

Time to mix up the martinis and get ready for the weekend, see y'all Monday!


Thursday, August 21, 2008


Hey Buddy, you're the one trespassing!

Well kids, the great state of Florida is certainly showing us who's boss. People are screaming "we're flooded, we've never seen anything like it!". Hunnies, let Miss Vero be the first one to break the news to y'all. You can pile on as much landscaping and mulch as y'all want, put it behind a pretty gate to keep it all safe, but facts are facts, we all live in a swamp!

The cute little fella above was walkin down the street in Barefoot Bay, mindin his own business when he was snatched up by the animal po-po (it even made the Orlando news):

Miss Vero has yet to venture out, perhaps by tonight we will brave the elements for some fine dining. For the past two days we have managed to keep ourselves amused with old movies, stacks of reading material, intimate cocktail parties and the fabulous "Project Runway" episode with the drag queen challenge!

We're sure that soon everything will be back to it's normal mediocre way in Vero. And then we can go back to throwing spitballs at all the candidates, criticize the PJ and report on our own high jinx and cocktailin adventures.
Until then,


Wednesday, August 20, 2008


Hopefully y'all have wrung yourselves dry and we can go back to putting umbrellas in their proper places. Miss Vero knows that we done lost an entire day drinking and waitin out this silly storm - well, at least the drinking part was fun.

We're just wishin that'll be the end of our troubles this hurricane season.


Tuesday, August 19, 2008


Ok kids, y'all know what to do. Let's check our lists:

#1 Marine cooler full of ice. Check.

#2 Fully stocked bar. Check.

#3 Aspirin and bottled water for headache tomorrow. Check.

If this had been an actual emergency we'd be sending y'all a postcard from somewhere fabulous.

Now, we'll just wait this out, cause we suspect things will blow over real soon. Keep yourselves safe.


Monday, August 18, 2008


Our peace lovin Secret Squirrel got a taste of the catty beachies.

So much for peace, love and groovey things. Miss Vero and our favorite companion, the Secret Squirrel attended the festivities at the Vero Beach Museum of Art Saturday night. A very lovely production, put together very well, by the very much appreciated museum staff and hosted by the very professional and congenial, Dr. Lucinda H. Gedeon. Yes, we love the Vero Beach Museum of Art.

Now watch out children, cause here's the part where Miss Vero gets cranky. If the level of snobbery and the attitude of self importance and the rude and down right obnoxious behavior of some of the party goers are any indication of the beachie barometer of the up comin season, well then, we will gladly keep ourselves at home, thank y'all very much.

Miss Vero was so embarrassed for our guest, the Secret Squirrel, who we've already mentioned is not from around these parts and when the Squirrel tried to make conversation or be friendly, was not well received. This was not in keeping with the brotherly love of the '60's, it was more like a high school dance where everybody was gathered in cliques and heaven help y'all if you didn't belong. Pathetic.

Miss Vero has said this before and hunnies we will say it again, what is it with the attitudes? Pluh-leeze, y'all need to get over yourselves.

After snappin some photos and chatting with friends, we rescued the Squirrel and repaired what damage had been done with extra attention and extra cocktails. Lawd knows we don't want to lose the services of our beloved Secret Squirrel!

What was lacking in manners by some, was made up for in creativity by others, not everybody had their snooty pants on.

Miss Cathy Hart, she was havin a good ole time, partying like she'd won something. We believe it was the go-go contest.

And we were so glad to see that Kurt Wallach finally got a make over.

Now if every one can remember why it is that we attend these charity functions, that would be a start.

Peace, Love and MWAH!

Friday, August 15, 2008


Is it us or does the "Choose a Chimp" headline next to a baby's photo seem odd? Ok, we thought maybe they're referring to the recent fad of choosing a monkey over children that the Orlando Sentinel talked about:

But we're gonna give them the benefit of the doubt and say this story is about the chimp sanctuary in Fort Pierce:

This was the question that begs an answer. We never did get to actually read the article because Miss Vero almost got her self kicked out of the pediatric dentist office yesterday, as we picked up this reading material and began howling and screaming with laughter. Now, we know ya'll are askin - Miss Vero, what in heaven's name were y'all doing in such a place? Hunnies, we were accompanying our good friend Lawdy Mama and her two non-monkids around town doing the back to school errands. Why? Because we find it so amusing to sing "It's the most wonderful time of the year" at the top of our lungs and twirl around with the shopping cart while buying school supplies. And anyway, we are celebrating the fact that come Monday, Lawdy Mama will have more time on her hands to shop, lunch and cocktail! With this in mind, it is Miss Vero's sincere recommendation that y'all choose real kids over monkids, cause there's no such thing as monkid school. But just to be sure, maybe we should check out the St. Ed's brochure, because for the right amount.....we're sure, just maybe....


Tomorrow night at the Vero Beach Museum of Art is the Magical Mystery Tour fund raiser. Miss Vero will be there! We'll post some pics and tell y'all about it on Monday. Haven't yet decided on what to wear, we're sure we still have something fabulous sixty's in the closet. Hope to see y'all there!


Thursday, August 14, 2008


Well children, we bet that y'all are wondering why Miss Vero is not contributin to all the political and gossipy hoopla that the PJ has been churning out lately. But where would we start?

Ira Hatch wants to get out of jail? If there's one thing that anyone who's ever lived in Indian River County knows it's not to get into trouble here. We doubt Mr. Hatch will ever get any sympathy, especially now that he's "indigent" and the public will have to pay for his defense.

Stan Mayfield's annual income listed at $31, 932? Yet his mortgage liabilities are 1 mil. Even with adding his wife's income, of $106,600 the formula for mortgage loan approval is off. And only mortgage liabilities are listed for the couple, no credit cards, car loans, insurance,anything else? Hmmm, we're not a financial planner but something's not right here.

With his Midwestern-weaselly-hot-cup-o-joe-Bob-Evans approach, Russ Lemmon grabs all the limelight in his pot stirring role as the PJ's local columnist, while poor Henry Stephens is out doing all the legwork and actually attending community functions and reporting responsibly.

Election Supervisor candidates Kay Clem and Kathy Hart in a catfight over a shopping trip.

Former Vice Mayor Lynn Larkin's civil suit merits huge coverage (with photo!) because...?

Kenric Ward throws out the delicious cliff hanger in his latest opinion column,da, da, da...Builder and political gadfly Joe Paladin - is a convicted felon. Tune in again for the next exciting episode!

Back in 2006 Tim Pipher was set to do a soap opera called - Vero Beach.

"Set in the southeastern Florida city, the soap will pit the past against the future as the principals of an old agricultural and citrus-based economy clash with the leaders of more modern businesses and influence."

Perhaps a sitch-e-ation comedy would be a better description of our local players.

Miss Vero thinks we should all mix up a batch of bloody marys and sit back and watch the sweeps weeks before the elections.

Oh, forgot to tell y'all...

Instead of dealing with the crowds at the opening of the Home Goods and Marshall's today, we thought we might get our shopping jones satisfied this way -

Decorative Arts/Estilo Boutique Charity Sale
The owners of lifestyle store Decorative Arts and trendy Estilo Boutique have teamed up for for a one-night special sale, Shop for a Cause, with profits going to the Environmental Learning Centers (ELC) Fire Fund.
ELC suffered a devastating fire June 30th where their entire wet lab and classroom were destroyed.

Shop for a Cause will take place August 14th from 5:30 to 8:00 P.M. at Decorative Arts in downtown Vero Beach. Shoppers can pursue sought-after fashions and some of the most exciting home decor items all under one roof.

To further support ELC's mission, customers will be given an eco-friendly woven reusable tote bag with each purchase and or donation.

Fabulous merchandise, wine, and shopping for a cause...what better excuse does a girl need to shop?

Decorative Arts is located in Historical Downtown at 1923 Old Dixie Highway in Vero Beach, FL. Shoppers can call 563.0040 with any questions.

Y'all know we love to support downtown!


Wednesday, August 13, 2008


Now if y'all have been payin attention, and we know you are kids, this is the day that Miss Vero will be catching up on spa treatments and afternoon cocktails. We are weary of the local politics and slightly exasperated to see that Miss Foote is not gone but just back from vacation. Sigh...


Tuesday, August 12, 2008


Good afternoon y'all!

Miss Vero just got an "URGENT" e mail from someone letting us know that a person using the name "secretsquirrel" is posting to the TCPalm website. Just to clarify - Miss Vero nor THE Secret Squirrel, nor anyone else associated on this site has posted, or will ever post to the TCPalm comments. Yes, we read them and howl with laughter but that's about it. And yes, some fans of Miss Vero have at times, gotten tired of the paperpoop and posted referring to Miss Vero's Beach House. So just calm down and remember -

"Miss Vero is one who does not take life too serious and wishes that more people would just get over their silly selves."



Only in Indian River County there should be two elephants, sometimes three.

Today's local news is interesting:

Tax Collector Hands Over Six Figure Job to Mayfield - Um, we mean endorses.
Couldn't they have just played poker for it?

Y'all would think that, at the very least, Miss Vero would get an invite to the Friday night "Roast"of Wesley Davis, still checkin our mail.... Oh, y'all didn't get one either? Must be some kinda bubba buddy ritual.

IRNA (Indian River Neighborhood Association) submits more entries than Common Ground in the "Win a Date with Miss Vero contest" - neither win (read July 31st post "Grow Up). We were gonna let y'all vote, but seriously why drag it on? It was one "endorse my candidate ad" after another. Everyone completely missed the point.

"Whether you’re 18 years old or 80 , you should not favor any organization when deciding how to vote…. Vote the person, not the organization."

That right there is about as much info as an 18 year old could handle about the upcoming elections (provided they are making their own decision and not followin in their mama or daddy's footsteps). So the writer of that quote and my lunch date yesterday was Miss Bea Gardner.

Now don't y'all go pestering Miss Bea for any info about Miss Vero. She has been sworn to secrecy and believe me children, nobody wants to see Miss Vero even a teensy bit annoyed. Let's just say it's not pretty. We are not endorsing or saying anything more about it. Just two ladies who have never met, having lunch. Check out Miss Bea's website and form your own opinions.
My goodness, we have had enough of politics. For now.

Hmm, should we comment on the fact that a "correspondent" from the PJ reported on the Gloria Estefan concert at the Hard Rock and not our old pal Russ? We'll let him lick his wounds a while before we play with him again. We're just plain tired of that topic. Yesterday's news kids.

In fact, we are so tired of the goings on around these parts that we're gonna hafta send the Secret Squirrel on a mission tonight to deal with the candidates.

County Commission Candidate Forum: Hosted by The Indian River County Chamber of Commerce. Courthouse Executive Center, 14th Avenue, Vero Beach, 5:15 p.m.

The Squirrel just loves that sort of thing.


Monday, August 11, 2008


Miss Vero was not happy about postin this weekend but the pickens were ripe, so we just had to. Sometimes the news tree is bare, but sometimes it's full and who'd a thought that would be in August? What more can we say about the Press Journal? How does a paper and a "real journalist" who spew a story for weeks on end, miss the announcement of Mrs. Estefan's "local" concert? We are just shaking our heads.

Also this weekend we were disappointed by the cancellation of the Land Shark party at Humiston Park. After wandering around looking for an answer, we ended up at the Riverside Cafe, drowning our disappointment with a few cocktails and games of trivia. Apparently the shindig was cancelled due to rain earlier in the day, but of course as Florida weather is known to do, by showtime it had cleared up beautiful. Riverside was packed with all the would be party goers and y'all know Miss Vero had a blast.


Have y'all checked out this website lately?
The reviews are coming in and the site is crisp, clean and easy to use. We like that it's not ad driven and solely devoted to Vero restaurants. It's a great guide that's evolving and lovingly hosted by someone who sees a need in the community and with their own time and talent is happy to fill the void. Y'all know we love that.

Up in Sebastian, we noticed that the Red Garlic was closed and then got word that it was indeed closed and now we hear that the Pig and Whistle pub (in the Appliance Direct shopping center) will be moving in. Fish and Chips on the River sounds good to us.

Sorry y'all, to cut this a little short today but we are busy, busy, busy, what with Savannah guests comin into town and parties to attend, new lists of people to annoy and politicians to have lunch with. What, we didn't tell y'all? Oh that's right, some one actually did win the "win a date with Miss Vero contest" so we better skidaddle and get to that luncheon. Details tomorrow kids....


Sunday, August 10, 2008


Will he finally end it?
Looks like Gloria called some one else...


More than four years after her last solo concert in the United States, Latin songbird Gloria Estefan is set to announce Monday that she'll play the Seminole Hard Rock in Hollywood sometime this fall.
The beauty of it: The 50-year-old singer of Conga and Here We Are is planning to donate some of the revenues to the Education Foundation of Palm Beach County, a nonprofit that pays for after-school programs.
"We did get the kind of phone call you always hope to get," said foundation director Mary Kay Murray. "It's really wonderful. Gloria just has a passion for kids and education."
Murray said she doesn't know how much the foundation is set to receive because Estefan's loot will have to be shared with similar foundations in Miami-Dade, Broward and Indian River counties.
"We're getting $2 per ticket sold and they're hoping to sell 7,000 tickets per show," Murray said. "There may be more than one concert."

Hmm, let's see...$2 per ticket x 7,000= $14,000/4 counties = $3,500!!! (if we're lucky)


Saturday, August 9, 2008


Now y'all know that Miss Vero never posts on the weekend, but if y'all want to have some crazy fun, get your cute behinds in motion and check out the scene at the Long Branch on Sunday nights. Click on the picture above for details. What can we say? We just love these guys, uh gals, uh guys - we just love 'em!


Friday, August 8, 2008


Look, if Russ Lemmon can fantasize about "healing" Vero Beach and luring Mrs. Estefan here to do that once promised "free" concert, then hunnies, Miss Vero can dream too...

Can y'all imagine? Mrs. Estefan eagerly devouring her dose of Lemmon droppings and saying - "Mira Emilio, Russito wants us to do that concert in Vero, hand me the phone, he's on speed dial!"

As if.

Please stop beating that horse, there's nothing left but bones. How many times must we beg for mercy? Leave the Estefans alone and stop pretending that you have an idea what it was like to go through those hurricanes!

A real investigative journalist would answer the contracting question. If y'all remember the comments that were posted to the hotel opening article, many subcontractors claimed there was some payment hankie pankie goin on.
Well kids, Miss Vero heard a rumor that all the subcontractors were paid by Proctor construction and now Proctor is owed many millions still. True? Y'all tell me 'cause I'm not the "real journalist" supposedly gettin paid to do that job.

Here it is Friday morning and we are still recovering from our wild Wednesday. Children remember, Miss Vero is a professional partier, so don't try to keep up. Here's how it went:

We started out at the crack of noon over at the M. T. Pockets Ranch discussing the treasure biz with our good friend Miss Taffi, who by the way would love our support in telling the State of Florida to stop harassing our Treasure Coast treasure people. So if y'all haven't had a chance, please read yesterdays post and send off a quick email saying "Leave the Treasure business as is".

We should have listened to our ole pal Miss B. Havior who very wisely told us:

"You've been busier than a boar bee in soft yella' pine. Just slow your azz down to a trot (it's hot outside) and spend a little more time with the cutest bartender in town. In case you're ready for a change, try the bar at the VB club and Resort. The Indigo Room's charmin'barman Tom, serves a mean martini and the burgers knocks the stuffin' outta of the burgers at Bobby's."

But no, we just had to go to Bobby's where we spotted school board candidate Charlie Wilson havin lunch. He musta worked up an appetite after being on the Rhett Palmer show that morning with the other candidates. Guy Barber was pining for the days when the paper was owned by the Schumann family and we loved that even Rhett voiced his disapproval of the Press Journal. After Rhett's Woodstock comment, (read June 4th post "Rhett Palmer's Hippie Claim) we've been randomly tuning in to see what other surprises the self proclaimed "mayor of the airwaves" has in store.

After some seriously needed afternoon spa time, Miss Vero hooked up with the Secret Squirrel, who for some reason had a hankerin for steak. We stupidly decided that we would try the Dockside Grill or "Bobby's II" at Royal Palm Point. As we arrived we were quick to notice the Barbara Sharp painting behind the desk (read May 15th post "Places to go, People to Annoy...") and Andre, formally of Carmel's, cheerfully greeted us but then broke the bad news that it would be an hour wait! Well waitin is just somethin that we don't take kindly to, especially in the midst of every local beachie poser with a bluetooth surgically implanted. Hunnies, if there's anything we can't stand, it's the vibe of the self important.

So what were our choices for steak? Outback or 14th Ave Steak House. We chose 14th Ave and guess what? We were treated like royalty! And it was so good, we hadn't been there in a long time and we're glad we went. We love to support local business and sure would love to see some life in downtown. The last restaurant critic at the PJ, Sheila O'Mera had this to say about 14th Ave back in 2006 and it was exactly the same on Wednesday:

Hmmmm, Maybe Miss Vero shouldn't be calling Miss Sheila "the last" restaurant critic at the PJ. Another big rumor that came our way, is that Miss Diana Foote has left. Could it be true? We haven't seen her opinion column or reviews in the past two weeks. Honestly, the person who tattled was sure that we'd be fiendishly delighted, but truth be told, Miss Vero doesn't have any ill will toward Miss Foote. Bless her heart, we just think she was not the right person for the job and her writing was/is a continual painful reminder of that. We sincerely hope that she is well and finding a place where she can wear that fur to lunch.

More Restaurant Hubbub - add it to the list, City Tavern is closed! No tidbits on that yet. And how 'bout Yannick and Valerie leaving Masion Martinique? We haven't been there in a while, but we wonder how the menu will change.

Of course we did take one piece of Miss B. Havior's advice and after dinner we mosied on down to visit with the Cutest Boy in Vero at the epicenter of Cool - Undertow. Miss Kitty always has it going on and most of the young Vero royalty makes it a destination. We chatted with the very beautiful Miss Tripson, who looked fabulous and had the cutest little outfit. She made us laugh when she told us that in the recent PJ story the reporter gave a blank stare when Addison Mizner was mentioned. Poor thing, if only they'd seen Miss Vero's post two weeks before (read July 24th,"Vero Treasure Chest"), they'd have known that Miss Vero made the Palm Beach Daily News story regarding Waldo and Mizner required reading for everyone in Indian River County.

Are we all caught up? Ohh, one more thing, here's a picture of ole Russ Lemmon gettin that call from Mrs. Estefan -

Have a great weekend kids, see y'all Monday!


Thursday, August 7, 2008


We had quite a day yesterday and finally got back into our gadabout and cocktailin ways. Rumors, gossip and speculation abound and until Miss Vero can sort it all out we'll be taking the high road this morning and not commenting....yet. Until then, (and - until we find the aspirin bottle) please take some time to help out one of our good friends.

Did y'all see Miss Taffi on the WPTV news when they were here in Vero? Taffi Fisher Abt and her family are very important to the Treasure Coast and Miss Vero is proud to count Miss Taffi as one of our dearest friends.

So today kids we ask y'all to help us out with a request from Miss Taffi:

Dear Miss Vero,

It seems the State of Florida, Division of Historical Resources has no one holding their reins in and the people of this Great State need to put forward their comments. I appreciate any help.

Thanks, Historic Shipwreck Salvage Policy Council (HSSPC)

Friends of HSSPC"
c/o Mel Fisher's Treasure Museum
1322 U.S. One
Sebastian, FL 32958

Here's the story:

First of all, for any of y'all that don't know, Miss Taffi is the daughter of legendary treasure hunter, Mel Fisher. And before y'all say you know somethin about Mel and his family, we suggest y'all go to the library and read a few books, or just go to the Mel Fisher Museum right here in Sebastian to learn the real stories about what went down (and was brought back up!):

Anyone who truly knows this family, could never say an unkind word about them. They have made it their life's work to pursue a dream and continue to do so and we give them all the respect that they deserve, because isn't that what being American is all about? Having the freedom to pursue your dreams?

For more than 40 years the Fisher family has been in the treasure salvor business and have sacrificed and worked to make some incredible treasure finds. Even after recovering the treasure of the Atocha, a battle over ownership with the Sate of Florida, continued right up to the Supreme Court, where a decision was granted in Mel Fisher's favor.

The Fisher family and corporation have established two museums, one here in Sebastian and another in Key West, to share their discoveries with the public. They have an Archaeologist and Marine Biologist on staff and seek out the most qualified individuals to help in their research.

Now here's where y'all come in:

The State of Florida , namely the Division of Historical Research wants to put treasure searching into the hands of Florida Universities and government control. This seems like a good idea on the surface, to reign in the cowboy treasure diver types, but when y'all consider that no new salvage permits have been issued since 1987 to any private salvors, then it becomes pretty clear that the State is the pirate, once again tryin to loot the booty!

Let Miss Vero ask y'all - When was the last time you saw a museum exhibit at a Florida college or university? And isn't it nice to be able to take yourself or your guests to a local museum and see why this is called the Treasure Coast?

Let's support the Mel Fisher Museum and keep one of our own in business.

write or email:

Ryan Wheeler PhD, Chief and State Archaeologist,Martin House1001 DeSoto Park DriveTallahassee, Florida 32301,


Barbara Mattick, Chief,Bureau of Historic Preservation, 500 South Bronough Street, Tallahassee, Florida 32399-0250,


Kurt S. Browning, secretary of State

If y'all have any question, at all about this issue, contact Miss Vero and we'll get y'all an answer.
Thanks so much!


Wednesday, August 6, 2008


Oh my goodness the Press Journal has published a story about the Patio restaurant opening this fall! Seems like we did that two weeks ago. Wait! We did do that two weeks ago (read July 24th post "Vero Treasure Chest"). Yesterday we asked when they'll notice that Rip's and Monte's have closed and today we have to report another restaurant closing in Sebastian - The Red Garlic. Thank you to our Supreme Sebastian Source.

And we just have to add - the Coste D'Este staycation idea? Puh-leeeese. It's just more Lemmon juice poured in the wound, feels good to get the uninformed riled, huh Russ?

Oh well, Miss Vero has bigger fish to fry today. We just gotta tell y'all that this business of bloggin is seriously cuttin into Miss Vero's cocktail time, so we are takin Wednesdays off. Besides, scoopin the PJ is gettin to be old hat.

Got a lunch date, libations and snarky-snacks, comin right up!


Tuesday, August 5, 2008


First of all, Miss Vero must give y'all an apology. We know that y'all have been looking for us and we have been late in posting this week. We have so much mail to sort through and a very serious request from a dear friend that must be posted accurately, so we are taking our time to do it right. We also have a new website launching this week, which has required a lot of our attention, but we're sure y'all will just love it when y'all see it!

And this whole Common Ground/IRNA can of worms that seems to be heatin up quickly. My, my. Did y'all see Mr. Lemmon's column today?

Here's what we have to say about that - Why would y'all treat your paying advertisers that way?

Miss Vero has stated before that we offer no safe haven to any politician, however, if we were accepting PAID advertising from a group who's opinion differs with ours, y'all can better believe we would have some good manners about the situation.


Since the PJ has set the bar on bad manners today let's play along, OK? Now we couldn't find this in their "shopping" section, where they list all of the advertisements that they post in the paper, but our actual copy of today's Press Journal ran this ad on page D3, right underneath "Dear Abby":

Tuesday August 5th
Anti-Doping Night

"The Vero Beach Devil Rays want to promote healthy living and a drug-free lifestyle with Anti-Doping Night in preparation for Olympic Night.

The Night will feature fun facts and trivia for fans in attendance and urine sample cups at the gates to the first 200 hundred fans in attendance."


Well, honestly we just don't want to attend that party.


Since one of the most e mailed articles in the PJ this week, is the story of Burt Reynold's real estate in Martin County:

We thought y'all might like to take a peek inside. Just click on the the picture at the top and y'all will be able to see Burt's pad, up close, in all it's 1970's decorative glory! Miss Vero remembers Mr. Reynolds fondly (although, Mr. Reynolds will not remember Miss Vero ) and would like to take a groovy little trip down memory lane with y'all. Today we celebrate BAD MANNERS and post our first (and last) centerfold!


Oh shoot, now we've done it! We heard through the grapevine that someone did not open a email from us because they thought we were a porn site. Well at least we don't take money from y'all before we uh......tarnish your reputation.

Monday, August 4, 2008


Well, there's not much to add to that picture, is there? Miss Vero snapped this photo ourselves while we, once again, spent the weekend in town. Not one to wallow in mediocrity children, of course we were on a mission for fun.

Friday night after an incredible dinner at the Red Rooster Cafe, (read the July 1st post "We've Seen All Good People") we made our way to the Riverside Theater to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show. The confusion regarding the over 18 admission policy was still ongoing, as we were told by a box office attendant that children were allowed as long as they were with a parent and sure 'nuf we did see a little girl in costume with her parents. However, the website of the theater group performing did state "This will be a "no holds barred" show and will be strictly 18 years old or older to attend." No matter, both shows were completely sold out and it was the most fun that Vero has seen in a month o'Sundays!

While Miss Vero was taking a few photos of the incredible cast, somebody rudely slapped us hard on the behind and when we turned around, a photographer winked and snapped our picture! So y'all might just see Miss Vero on the group's website:


A lot of letters have come in over the weekend and Miss Vero is tying our best hunnies, to keep up. If we haven't responded to y'all, be patient! We promise we'll get back to y'all soon.

One person wrote that Miss Vero was slipping because we didn't take the bait from Russ Lemmon and comment on the Kay Clem, Kathy Hart shopping trip. We'll just let the fur settle in that catfight. What we're more concerned about is seeing the demo of the new voting machines that we told y'all about (read July 25th post "The Counting Question"). Here's the response that we got, the same day, from Miss Clem's office addressing our concern:

Re: Voting machines‏
Fri 7/25/08 4:11 PM
We will get it on there -- we were trying to alter one we got from the vendor to no avail. We can at least put the commercial on the web -- very sorry.
Kay Clem772-778-8257 Home772-226-3440 x. 3435 Work772-633-4647 Cell-----Original Message-----
From: Miss Vero
Hello Miss Clem! We make it a point to let anyone we write about have the opportunity to respond to our postings. Even though we are considered a humor blog, we take voting issues very seriously. We respectfully ask that you might put the video demonstration of the voting machines on the Supervisor of Elections website. If this is not possible, perhaps TCPalm can post it. It would really put our mind at ease to see the demonstration before we vote. Thank you so much. Sincerely,Miss Vero PS. There's also a really good picture of you from the parade on our July 4th post, if you haven't seen it!

As of this morning, still no demo on the site. Maybe they're out shopping?


What is it with him? That man is just like a dog digging up and chewing on the same old bone over and over again. And he threatens to trot it out again on Thursday! Now y'all know we hafta pick apart a few things in Mr. Lemmon's Sunday column, right?

First he says-

"What did I learn last week? Well, among other things, the 2004 post-hurricane concert flap — Vero Beach City Council's snub, real or perceived, of singer Gloria Estefan — is a deep wound in Indian River County's psyche"

Really? Ya think? But it's all good for feedback and high reader numbers isn't it, Oh Master of the Obvious.

He continues with:

"On Wednesday, I revisited the incident because Estefan spoke on the record about it for the first time."

Well that's one way a-puttin it. Miss Vero received word from a very reliable source that Mr. Lemmon was present at a well attended PR media day on June 17th, where Mrs. Estefan gave several interviews. That ole Russ! He was so kind to wait six weeks after the opening hoopla to fade, then write that for us on a slow news week!


Miss Vero has e mailed (read July 31st post "Grow Up") asking for a comment from both groups. No official word yet, but lots of stuff from interested parties. One letter from John's Island caught our attention. The writer is extremely opposed to charter and IRNA and urges their fellow JIer's to vote for specific candidates. Along those lines there's an editorial by Joel Tyson from Fellsmere that y'all might find interesting:


A reader asked Miss Vero if we've heard any more news about Rip's and Monte's. Sorry hunney, but not any more than VeroBeach32963 first reported on July 13th:

Here's a better question - When do y'all think the PJ will notice they're closed?

And yes, from all the mail, comments and votes, Miss Vero will - for the time being, be the only contributor to the Beach House. Now that doesn't mean y'all are off the hook. Miss Vero still needs your comments, emails and tasty tidbits that y'all send our way. Thanks kids!


Friday, August 1, 2008


Yeah! Friday night, party time right? Not if you're a teenager in Vero Beach. Miss Vero is certainly not a teenage, but we remember being one and we sure are glad that we 're not one now because we would die of boredom!

We were visiting our friend, Lawdy Mama who has two very tolerable medium sized children, who will inevitably become teenagers. Lawdy Mama was bemoanin the fact that soon they'll be drivin her crazy because there's nothing for teenagers to do here. "It's like the whole town has installed Mosquitos."

Because of our puzzled look, Lawdy Mama explained that there is a devise that can be installed, usually in places where teens gather, that emits a sound that only they can hear and drives them away. Huh?,2933,352410,00.html

Maybe Lawdy Mama is right. There's a group of Miss Vero's friends that are all going to the Rocky Horror Picture Show and when they went to buy tickets, they asked if their was an age restriction. Sure enough no one under 18 is allowed. Although, good thing they asked because there is no mention of it in the event listing.

How could something as innocent as the Rocky Horror Picture Show be Adults Only?

There must be some kind of artistic, safe and fun event for teenagers to attend. We thought we had the answer, the Magical Mystery Tour at the Vero Beach Museum of Art. Surely at $50 a ticket we should be able to bring along a well mannered teen to an event celebratin the '60's?

Nope. No one under 18 allowed, for what we were told was a "liability issue", since alkeehol will be available.

Miss Vero wonders, how will we ever get our young adults to act properly, if we don't give them the skills and opportunities to act as adults?

We have been way too serious the last few days, time to get back to basics.

Have a good weekend kids and raise em up right (your martini glasses), be back on Monday!